Monday, October 20, 2008

Who can forget the birth of their first child?

Even though it was almost 9 years ago for me, I still remember the overwhelming feeling of cluelessness. It wasn't that I was ill-prepared - I had read every baby book recommended to me prior to her birth, and I could easily summarize the main idea of Sears, Ferber, Weissbluth, and the What to Expect series. What I found missing the first few months was practical information, like how to get around the city of Chicago with a stroller or what neighborhood restaurants are family friendly.

I remember the first time I tried to take my baby daughter in her stroller to a Wiggleworms class. I walked to the Addison el station, took the elevator up, boarded the train, switched trains, and then exited at Armitage only to discover that not all el stations were wheelchair (or stroller!) accessible. I thought I was so public transportation and city savvy, but I suddenly realized that this new baby would change my routine in even more ways than I anticipated. It didn't even occur to me that my navigation skills would have to be rethought with a stroller. And unfortunately, I have learned that many destinations, even those billed as "family friendly" are not easy to explore with a stroller. All the fun activities I had planned with my daughter suddenly became tedious because of unforeseen obstacles. Our outings were hit or miss as to whether I enjoyed the experience or ended up incredibly frustrated.

Like many first time moms, I sought out a group of likewise new moms and we began to share our experiences, such as which of our favorite restaurants are baby-tolerant, which have changing tables, and which ones have more than one high chair for patrons with babies. The older our babies got, the more our needs changed, and the more quickly our e-mail network grew to warn friends of bad experiences and share great ones. The problem was that our frustrations outweighed our joys, and we lamented the fact that there was no central resource for practical information PRIOR to an outing. Surely other moms with older children had already figured out how to navigate the town with a baby or two in tow. Why did every new parent, every new moms group, need to recreate the wheel, so to speak? I know the internet is full of websites that advertise fun activities for kids. But before I pack up the diaper bag and head out for the day to an activity that sounds amazing, I want to know the reality behind the advertising. Do I know anyone who's been there? What is their opinion? How would they rate the activity, location, price, changing tables, etc.? Can I get some feedback on the best way to get there (drive or public transportation), what I should bring (is the food child friendly, healthy, is it cold/hot inside, etc.) and any tips to make the first trip a success. How many times have I left somewhere thinking, "next time, I will...." Why should the first visit somewhere be a learning experience?

It was this group of questions that led to the kidwinks.com information sharing website. Before
I set out on a great adventure, I check to see if someone has been there and done that, and shared the information with this group.

I plan to share a lot of my experiences and opinions. I welcome your feedback, too.
Dream Weaver, mother of 3.